Saturday, May 05, 2007


It’s 0600 and I’m sitting in an early-morning CIB (Commander’s In-Briefing) about sexual assault. I was focusing on keeping my eyes open when I’m approached by my platoon sergeant, who whispers to me that he wants to see me during lunch. Rowe, a buddy of mine, figured I had fallen asleep during the briefing and that the meeting would equal pushups. I had no other idea for why the platoon sergeant would need to see me in his office, so I wasn’t about to argue with him.

After waiting in line outside his office, the platoon calls me in, telling me to shut the door. I was almost certain that pushups were imminent at this point until he tells me the reason for meeting, being complaints filed by my roommate. The sergeant summed it up by saying I wasn’t a “nice roommate” and then started pretty much making fun of my roommate for a couple minutes. I gave the sergeant no BS, stating that my roommate’s behavior gives me no reason to go out of my way to be a “nice roommate,” and yet hasn’t given me enough cause to go out of my way to be a total “shit-bag of a roommate.” My platoon sergeant stated he believed I wasn’t the kind of guy that actively seeks to piss people off and decided that moving my roommate as the best course of action. I guess my roommate’s plan backfired on him.

Ok, I’ll admit, I’ve had my clashes with roommates in the past. I’m not the easiest guy to live with if you leave the living space a trashy mess, but other than that, I leave people alone. If you go complaining to some sort authority, have better reasons for doing so other than the scowl on my face unsettling you. I figure I must look pissed normally, but I think that comes with the territory of having an ugly mug. This is the military, bitching won’t be taken seriously unless you’ve got some serious reasons to do so.
Song of the Moment: “Holier Than Though” by Metallica

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

The Outlaw Torn

This may sound somewhat like a post made earlier but I’m compelled to comment further. It’s been more than a half a year since I’ve come to Monterey and I’ve yet to find someone I can comfortably call a friend without immediately having my mind casting doubts on whether that person is indeed a “friend.” This is burning me out. I don’t have the time to take leave from my duties to spend time with those I can trust.

Regulations around here don’t seem to help either. Their current setup makes it difficult to socialize after work with the people worth getting to know, the ones who’ve been there, done that. I’m left with the younger crowd, who for the most part aren’t worth a damn. Next greatest generation my ass.

Maybe I’m placing all the blame on others to avoid taking a look at myself. It’s a common fault committed by most of us. Perhaps years of living on my own have left me hesitant to get close to others through countless disappointments? Maybe I’m socially inadequate? Maybe I’m wasting time asking to many questions?
“I’m afraid to get close to people, ‘cause I don’t know how to do it. I don’t know how you’re supposed to do it.”
Movie of the Moment: Metallica: Some Kind of Monster starring Kirk Hammett, James Hetfield, Rob Trujillo, and Lars Ulrich.